Monday smile – Guffipedia II

The Guffipedia is a “dictionary of business jargon and corporate nonsense”. It is published by the Financial Times newspaper and houses the “finest drivel” from their archive – as well as “fresh twaddle submitted by readers and certified” by Lucy Kellaway.

This post contains just a few of the newer entries in the Guffipedia, but see here for a previous selection of guff. 🙂

broad-geogBroadly based platform of geographies

  • Translation into plain English: Several countries
  • Perpetrator: Diageo
  • Usage example: “Diageo today is driving performance across a broadly based platform of geographies, as well as brands.”

feetCognitive walkthrough

  • Translation into plain English: Website testing
  • Perpetrator: UK Government Digital Service
  • Usage example: “During a cognitive walkthrough, a user researcher assesses a service or website against a known set of user goals.”

motivationKnowlivators

  • Translation into plain English: Knowledgeable motivator
  • Perpetrator: Eversheds
  • Usage example: “What we look for [in our trainee lawyers]: innovateer; knowlivator, logithiser, performibutor, proactiloper, professionary, prioricator, winnomat.”

What can I say? 🙂

See plenty more where those came from in the Guffipedia here.

 

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