Monday smiles – I give you this orange

Everyday phrase:
“I give you this orange.”

Legal translation:
Know all the persons by these presents that I hereby give, grant, bargain, sell, release, convey, transfer, and quitclaim all my right, title, interest, benefit, and use whatever in, of, and concerning this chattel, known as an orange, or Citrus orantium, together with all the appurtenances thereto of skin, pulp, pip, rind, seeds, and juice, to have and to hold the said orange together with its skin, pulp, pip, rind, seeds, and juice, for his own use and behoof, to himself and his heirs, in fee simple forever, free from all liens, encumbrances, easements, limitations, restraints, or conditions whatsoever, any and all prior deeds, transfers, or other documents whatsoever, now or anywhere made, to the contrary notwithstanding, with full power to bite, cut, suck, or otherwise eat the said orange or to give away the same, with or without its skin, pulp, pip, rind, seeds, or juice.

Author: Unknown. Apologies to all who those already know of this little text. 

Monday smiles – The sky is blue

Well, for those of us in the northern hemisphere, Spring certainly seems to have sprung.

In keeping with these lovely weather conditions, I offer you this classic text by Daniel R. White, from his book Trials and Tribulations, Appealing Legal Humor. I just love it.

Click here to access a PDF on the publisher’s website. You may like the ‘Principles of Legal Writing’ on the third page too.


Monday smiles – Nutkin the squirrel

Today’s post was brought to my attention by It is an appeal involving the keeping of a squirrel as a family pet, in Pennsylvania, USA.

You can find the whole opinion here, but I’ve selected a few highlights below. This is authentic, by the way, as you will see from the opinion published in the official record. Judge Hudock clearly has a great sense of humo(u)r…

“This appeal revolves around the life and times of Nutkin the squirrel.

Nutkin’s early life was spent in the state of ferrae naturae, in the state of South Carolina, and, as far as we can tell, in a state of contentment. She apparently had plenty of nuts to eat and trees to climb, and her male friends, while not particularly handsome, did have nice personalities. Life was good.

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Simply the best legal humor blog

Lowering the Bar is an inspired fount of humour (or should I say humor). Whenever you’re feeling down and need to laugh out loud, I suggest taking a look at this wonderful blog. It is compiled by a San Francisco lawyer called Kevin Underhill. He is also a thoroughly good egg, who manages a pro bono program called Pets are Wonderful Support. (Mr Monti take note in Italy, please).

Here is just a taster. Go and explore – and do let me know your personal favorites!

Legal humour from a historic bookseller

To make a change from the doom and gloom of world news, why not read this delightful little book published by the famous and highly respected London legal booksellers Wildy & Sons Ltd.

To quote from the publishers’ website: “”If you’re a member of the legal fraternity (or even if you’re not) this is one jolly book. As Christmas will soon be upon us, this book is a gift for your more solemn legal friends with more than a touch of the bizarre in court”. Find out more by clicking here.

Wildy, established in 1830, have a very extensive catalogue and ship worldwide.